Adoption Update #4

I know that stuff has happened between the July posting and this one, but here is the latest and greatest information. This is as of October 11, 2011.

Hello everyone, this is a long blog so if you don't have time to read it, do it later. There is a lot of information in it.

Ok, we have been in court for the last two days and we really appreciate your prayers. Court yesterday consisted of CPS changing their goal for what to do with Jody. Their goal for the past 16 months has been for an unrelated adoption (or secondarily reunification with dad). Then yesterday in court they announced that they were going for only for reunification with dad. This sent everyone for a tailspin, including the judge, who was mad to say the least. He then promptly postponed the case until today.

So, when the judge left court yesterday, we (being the grandparents, the aunt who has had custody of Jody for 16 months, Jonathan and myself) all stayed back and talked to the ad-litem attorneys (court-appointed to represent the child). The ad-litems then informed us that at this point CPS could come back today and drop the case and we would have no standing. Jody would go back to his father. This was not an option for any of us. So the ad-litems then went into action and told the aunt that she needed to get her own attorney and file a petition for intervention. So, I spent from the end of court (5:30) to about 9pm coordinating the meeting that we were going to have this morning with the new attorney for the Aunt.

This morning, the aunt and I went downtown and met with the new attorney. We loved her. She told us what to expect today and she gave us hope that we could win this battle. The aunt and grandparents are paying for the new attorney, which gives an indication of how motivated they are for Jody to go to a good home. Up to this point, all court costs have been covered by the state. So, the new attorney filed the petition for intervention as well as a petition for continuance. When we got to court at 1:30 today, she handed the paperwork to the other attorneys involved and you could see the surprise on their faces. When it was our turn before the judge, all of the attorneys spoke and the judge made some "recommendations" that we all think are great, because it will hopefully hold the birth father a little more accountable. Then the judge granted both of the petitions that our lawyer put before him. He also granted a new mediation, which is what our attorney recommended, and a new trial date.

So, here is what comes next. We do NOT go to trial next week. The dad has to fill out another financial form, because the judge stated that his belief is that the dad was not indigent and that dad would have to make payments back to his lawyer (!). This thrilled us, because he is no longer indigent and would be responsible for covering his own costs. Then the judge spoke to the lawyers and recommended to the father's attorney that he should try and make his client take a deal at mediation because if he doesn't he could be going before a "firing squad" at trial. So this is also good news for us. So before the end of the year, we will be heading to mediation again. This time with an attorney speaking for us. Our attorney will also be investigating the father and all allegations so that she can be best prepared for mediation and for potential trial. The outcome that we would like at mediation would be for both mom and dad to terminate their own rights. This would be the best case scenario and unlikely given all that has occurred so far. The other compromise they could make would be them granting the aunt, primary managing conservatorship (PMC). Once that is granted the aunt has custody of the child, but she can then designate if she wants someone else to be guardian. She can have him placed with us and CPS would be off the case, which is the plan if PMC occurs. The parents would still have parental rights and would have to pay child support and do visitations. The next step would be that we would keep Jody in our home full time. If, as expected, the parents don't fulfill their responsibilities with child support and/or visitations during the next year from the time of pmc, then we could file for termination and be able to adopt. So, it could go on for another year without final adoption, but we could get Jody in our home by the new year.

Keep praying for us

Adoption Update #3

Ok, so June has come and gone and we did not have either mediation or a hearing like we were supposed to. We were informed that the mediation would be held on July 11th, so we wait again. We have been told that we are to be at the mediation hearing so Jonathan will go as has been the norm for us. He goes, while I watch the baby. We don't have high hopes for this mediation. Let me explain why I don't have high hopes for mediation. Mediation is supposed to show the birth parents what all they have going against them, so that they will then terminate their own rights without having to wait on the judge to terminate their rights. The birth parents actually can ask for visitation, or for cards, pictures, and other things from the time the parents terminate their rights and final adoption by the adoptive parents. Then the adoptive parents can terminate all contact with the birth parents.

I don't have high hopes for this due to the fact that the birth parents in our case would rather blame the judge for terminating their rights then terminating them on their own, because then they would have to admit that they are bad parents (at this time). Since, this has been the case in the past with at least the birth mom, we have a little bit of reason to assume this will be the same this time around.

We know that God is still in control of this situation and believe it or not, we have more people on our side than even I can believe. I will tell you more about that at another time. We are still hoping and praying that everything that is currently going on with the birth parents will come to light with both the judge, the lawyers, and the child advocates. We have had some good news, but as any of you know with CPS that can change very quickly and without warning. Keep us in your prayers as we continue this journey.

Cody's Summer Trip

Well, as we usually do, we had my nephew Cody out for a week at the beginning of the summer. Actually, he was out here even before school was out for us in Houston. This was fantastic, because we were able to go to all the fun events before the crazy summer trips began. We hit some fun and unusual museums, such as the art car museum and we tried to get to the telephone museum, but they were closed the day that we wanted to go.

We of course hit the beach in Galveston, which for us was fantastic this time, because we were able to get to the beach with very few people around us. We tried a new beach this year again. I don't think we have gone to the same beach twice in the five years that Cody has come out. If we would have had the right tools, Cody was going to dig a hole as tall as he was, but unfortunately he only got to about waist height, which is about three feet before it started flooding with sea water. He couldn't figure it out, because as he stated that didn't happen in San Diego, CA, when he was there. We didn't have an answer for him, so if you read this and you know the answer let me know.

Cody was also able to meet the baby boy that we are hoping to adopt and he thought he was cool. (Most popular word for a 13yr old). I think he just liked that he slept through the night, as the last time he was here we had a four month old and a fourteen month old and neither of them slept through the night, or they were up very early.

Another annual tradition is the berry picking which just happens to fall at the same time as his trip out here. We decided to pick not only blueberries but we also picked blackberries. Overall, we had a really good time. I think the only thing that would have made it better would have been if we could have found a scooter park or skate park that allows scooters for him to show off some of his skills.

Wendy's Birthday

We kept my birthday this year a little more low key than Jonathan's. Of course I wasn't turning 40 like he was either, so it was good to be low key. We decided to take a little trip up to Fredericksburg, TX. We had a blast at a little B&B off of the main road by two blocks. Just enough to allow us to have quiet at night, but close enough to allow us to walk everywhere.

We enjoyed a good time, wine tasting, eating out, sight seeing, such as the Texas White House, including the plane and runway that are there. It was a good time to get away. On the last morning we were there, we decided to try this little coffee house a block from our B&B and found the local coffee house cat helping himself to a  little water from the fishbowl on the table. Just some of the local flavor.

Adoption #2

Ok, so as many of you know, we went to court yesterday. This proceeding was to see if the birth parents had done what they were supposed to do, and then to see what the judges ruling was going to be. Well, lets just say, it didn't go as we had planned. We figured on there being an extension for another month, but we didn't figure on the next part of the case.

The next part of the case...

The judge ordered Child Advocates onto the case, so we now have one Child Advocate and two volunteers to work with in regards to this case and we have been informed that at some point they will be coming to our house to talk to us and inspect our home. We aren't worried about that at all. The Child Advocates will also be talking to the Grandparents, the Aunts/Uncles, the babies sister, birth parents, and everyone else in the family who knows what is going on in the family dynamics. Then on or before June 16th we will all head to mediation with a retired Judge. This judge will talk to all of us and see if we can come to a understanding as to what is best for the baby. My assumption is that the Judge and the Child Advocates will return all of the information to the presiding Judge and from there he will make his ruling on June 22nd.

If he does not make a ruling on June 22nd, we head to a Jury Trial. What that entails, I have no idea and I hope and pray that we don't get that far, for my own sanity. The judge has extended the one year deadline by one week, so instead of the end of this case being July 27, it is now August 1st. This was requested by CPS, although we don't really know why.

So, there is still a lot up in the air right now and we ask that you continue to pray for us as we go through this process. We truly believe that God is in control and we have the reassurance that the Grandparents want us to have this child as they have said as much to the judge yesterday. God has everything in his hands and the Grandparents and us truly believe that.

Adoption

Well, this post will be long and unfortunately not full of pictures as we are not allowed to post anything yet. The end of February we got a call from the music minister at our church asking us if we would be interested in adopting a nine month old baby boy. I told him that we would need more information but were willing to at least listen to what might be going on with this situation. So with that, he said that he would let the person know that we were at least interested.

Let me go back. The grandparents of this baby boy had decided after having him from the time that he was 2 1/2 half months old that they were not going to be able to raise this baby and that he needed a family that could keep up with him. They wanted to be grandparents, not parents. So, when CPS told them that they were going to broadcast the baby, the grandparents asked if they could find a suitable home for him that was a good Christian home. CPS (to my astonishment) said that they could, but that the family would have to be certified by the state first. So the grandparents, started calling churches to ask if they knew of anyone that was willing to adopt a baby boy. Well, when they got to our church, the notice went out confidentially and before we knew it, three people from our church had recommended us to this family.

So, we got the call from the music minister and then waited, and waited, and waited. Until finally we decided that the grandparents must have found another family for their grandson. So we decided that we would just continue to wait on our agency to find us a family. Well, the middle of March comes and we get another call from our church saying that the grandparents would like to talk to us. So, we prayed about what to do. Because if you know us, you know that for us, we really wanted siblings, so that we could be done with the adoption process in one fell swoop. I knew that I would be ok with one child, but I knew that my husband who was raised in a house as an only child really wanted two. So, as we continued to pray about this situation, he told me one night that he would be okay with having one kid at a time, or possible just one kid total. Depending on what the Lord decided. This completely blew me apart.

So we met with the grandparents on a Saturday in March. We immediately fell in love with them and the fact that they love this little guy as if he were their own. We were also a little surprised to find out that parental rights had not been terminated, but we knew that God had started this so He would see it through. So, again after praying about this baby for a week, we decided to meet him. Well, lets just say, we hit it off with him too. He is a very precious little boy and so much fun to be around. So with that, CPS said that we should start visitation with the baby as well.

You would think that all would be done now and we would have the baby in our home, but God has other plans. We went to court on April 13th with everyone hoping that parental rights would be terminated at this hearing, since we are nine months into this case now. Unfortunately, that is not what happened. Due to elections, we had a new judge who was not familiar with the case and gave a thirty day extension on the case. So we go back to court on May 18th, with the hopes that parental rights will be terminated at this time. We completely trust in God that He has brought all of us together for a reason and that if this is what His will is for us that this baby, who will be one by the time the court hearing takes place be placed in our home shortly after this court hearing.

We ask that you continue to pray for us as we go through this journey for this little guy. We have also recently found out that the birth parents are now fighting to get custody back. After showing no interest in him for the past nine months, so we pray that the judge will see through this little display.

Jonathan's Birthday!

This April, we decided to celebrate Jonathan's 40th birthday with a BBQ party in our back yard with family, friends, and neighbors. We set up a croquet set, a ring toss set for the little kids and we were able to have some special friends over, which we will talk about in a adoption post coming soon. Thank you to all of the friends who came to celebrate with us.

The kids also had fun as one of the neighbors brought over confetti eggs and we told the kids that they could attach Jonathan with them once he sat down. Well, the man was so busy, playing, BBQing and having fun that it took him a long time to sit down. Once he did though, it was on and I have to say that the kids got him good. He might have come away a little bruised, but I think he enjoyed it.

Valentine's Day 2011

 I am almost caught up. I can't believe it. This year, we decided that we would go to the zoo for Valentine's day. It was a great time for just Jonathan and I to spend together. We had both been so busy with trips, projects and work that we needed this day for us. To celebrate us as a couple. We may have done the unconventional thing and gone to the zoo and then gone for BBQ afterwards, but to us it was a great time to spend together.

 We found this picture and the name of the lion appropriate and funny all at the same time, so of course we had to take a picture of my Jonathan underneath it and then we decided we better take one of the really lion Jonathan. Which do you think looks more fierce?

Mural

In January I was finally able to finish up a mural that I had been working on for a friend's daughter. It had taken me a little while to finish due to the fact that I didn't have a lot of time and she was busy with shuttling two kids around and keeping them busy. Here are some of the pictures of the mural. Enjoy!

Jonathan's family

This new year also brought time to visit Jonathan's family again. Unfortunately, the first visit was due to the death in the family. It is always good to be with family during these times. I was able to meet Jonathan's cousins, aunt, and uncle for the first time this year. It was nice to talk to them and get to know them more.

Then later this year, Jonathan and one of his cousins were able to go back to the St. Louis area, again for a death in the family. The boys (Jonathan and his cousin) had fun driving the mustang back to St. Louis and everyone was able to get caught up on each others lives.

Pictures I forgot to add

Here are some pictures that I forgot to post.

  Cookie and Dad with her Uncle in front of his car at the George R. Brown Convention center in Houston over Thanksgiving weekend.

 The picture that had to be taken so that all of her siblings back in Phoenix could be jealous of her. She grew up here in Houston and always remembered Shipleys donuts, so in order to make her siblings jealous this was taken. I have to say that they got on the plane with a donut for her sister, but from my understanding it didn't make it to Phoenix before it got the best of her and my dad. Sorry!

 Fun times over at my brother and sisters house. We were goofing off with the kids on the weekend of the wedding. It was a good time to get to know my niece and nephew again.

 Isn't she just adorable. Such the photogenic little girl! Gotta love it!

Then there is mister blue eyes and all sorts of mischief. He reminds me a lot of my little brother when he was this age and they will have their hands full if he follows along my brothers footsteps. Love you brother!

The New YEAR!

Well, the new year has come and gone, but I am just getting around to blogging about it. Oh, well!! The year for us did not start out to well. I ended up having to go back to Phoenix the beginning of January to due a death of a dear sweet friend. It was unexpected and we later found out due to some of the medications that she was on. Jonathan was not able to come out until later due to his work schedule, but since we had already planned on come out as is our usual trip in January, he was able to make it.

This trip to AZ was a little unusual for us too, as it was the first trip back to Phoenix where there was another woman living in my dad's house. It was good to see, but also hard to see as everywhere I looked there were reminders of my mother. So with my dad and Cookies' permission we took down the big drapes in the living and dining room and repainted the walls. We also bought new blinds for both the living and dining rooms to get rid of the old verticals that were so weather rotten that they were falling apart. It turns out that this was just the first of many painting jobs that were to come for my dad and Cookie.

Jonathan was also able to go skiing for the first time in almost four years. He went with a good buddy Isaac. This skiing trip just might have to turn into a regular thing for him. He told me later that he really missed skiing and since we all know that there are no ski slopes anywhere close to us. This just might have to do. He also told me that he looks forward to teaching our kids how to ski. I on the other hand stayed home and spent the day shopping with Cookie and enjoying some time to relax. I don't ski. I have taken one ski lesson and that was over six years ago. I may take it up again in the future, but we will have to see. Notice in the picture that Jonathan is wearing his Fire fighter turnouts. He doesn't have any ski clothes anymore, but found out that these work really warm as they are water resistant and really warm.

Since my dad and Cookies house is now getting full with furnishings from two homes, it was also decided that on this trip, Jonathan and I would bring back my antique furniture. This included a bed, dresser, high boy, two mirrors, and a desk and chair which were not able to make it in the truck. We have a big shout out to friends who loaned us their truck for the trip as we don't have a vehicle that could have carried this furniture back with us. I was also able to load up about a dozen more boxes of stuff that will eventually make it back to our house here in Houston. Hopefully, if my dad and Cookie drive out this year some time, they will be able to bring some of the stuff with them as well. Otherwise, we will be bringing it back with us every time we come out to Phoenix, since we almost always drive out in January.

December 2010

In December, we were able to visit Jonathan's parents outside of Asheville, NC. We were able to find really great ticket prices straight from Houston to Asheville, which is fantastic as otherwise we would have had to drive. Which in reality I don't mind, but overall, would prefer to have less travel time. In the past, we have had to fly into Nashville and then drive about five hours to reach them. Now, there are straight shot flights. This makes it much nicer.

While we were there, we were able to see snow, the Biltmore, and just the general Christmas spirit. It was also fun to see Jonathan's mother sing in her Senior Choir at a Christmas performance that they had while we were there.

This picture of the Cardinal on the bird feeder is one of my favorite shots. I might just have to use it for a Christmas card this next year. I stood just inside the back door at my in-laws house with the camera posed for awhile before I finally was able to get this picture. I think my in-laws thought that I was crazy, but to me it was the perfect shot. I think they agreed after they saw it too. It was fun to be in the cold weather for a little while, but it was also nice to get back to the relatively warm weather of Houston.

Thanksgiving

To my delight, my dad and his new wife (Cookie) were able to come  out to Houston for Thanksgiving. They arrived on Thanksgiving day, which was great and we were able to enjoy them for almost a week. As usual, we had a project for my dad and Jonathan to do while he was out here. We can't have my dad out and not have a project of some sort for him to work on. It just wouldn't be right. We were also able to fit a nice visit with Cookies Uncle into the trip. He was working and showing his car at the George R. Brown convention center and gave us tickets to get in. The little fire engine is one of three little cars that her Uncle has restored for his grandkids. Of course being a fire fighter family, we had to have this shot.

We also enjoyed having some fun at our neighbor sons expense. He has been parking his truck in front of his parents and our house for a long time and it was the first time that it was gone for awhile. So since we happened to have this sign in our garage (don't ask). We decided to put up the sign. Of course we had his parents permission as well as our other neighbors permission. It was fun to see and it was really fun to see him come home and run over the sign because he got so mad at it. I have to say, I think there is a little friction between him and the neighbors with regards to his parking habits. Not to mention the truck is really loud.

The project that my dad and Jonathan worked on while he was out here, was of course the garage. We had purchased a new door for the back of the house, so that we could put the old door from the back of the house on the back of the garage for easy access from the garage to the back yard. So, with my dad's help both doors were installed in one day. I don't have any pictures of that though. It was a good time and thankfully the weather held out for us too.

October Wedding 2010

At the end of October my father married again. Thankfully, we were able to make it out there for the wedding. Which of course can be a challenge when you have a husband working in the fire department. Will he be able to get off for the time, will he be working on those days and if so, will the Captain let him have time off. Well, thankfully, he had vacation scheduled for the month of October, so it was no problem to just change the dates so that we could make it. The time was fun to see old friends, to see my dad happy with his new bride, and to be able to spend some time with family.  Unfortunately, there are not many pictures of our time out there, due to the fact that we pretty much ran ninety to nothin the entire time. A couple of days before the wedding, I got to watch Cookie (the new bride) cut my dad's hair in order to make him a little more respectable for the wedding.

Then on the morning of the wedding, we found out that there was a small car show going on in Chandler. So of course, being with a bunch of guys we had to go. It was a fun time due to the fact that it was my brothers whole family, my dad, and my husband and myself. It was nice to just be us for one last time before adding another person to our already strange brood.

 The last picture is one of my favorites as it is of my sweet niece and nephew all dressed up for the big day. Could they get any cuter!

Mustaches

I am not a fan of the mustache on my husband, so let me write a little he said/she on how this conversation went.

J - Hey honey, the guys at the station all want to grow mustaches and then get our picture taken.
W - Why?
J - Well some of the guys think it would be cool.
W - I don't really like mustaches, when are they going to take the picture? 
J - Why don't you like mustaches? They are going to take the picture in two tours (aka 2 weeks).
W - I just don't like the feel or look of mustaches on some guys. If it is only going to be two  tours, then ok, but you get to deal with the consequences.
J - Man.

So, he grows the mustache for two weeks. Needless to say, his is pretty good, but they decide that some of the guys mustaches are not full enough or something yet, so it goes on for another week. Here is my lovely husband as he looks with a mustache. He must really love his job to put up with me complaining/grumbling about it for two weeks. I have to defend myself though. I was not the only wife complaining. 

THE MUSTANG!

No, we did not get a horse. This would be the dream car of my husbands. He talked for a long time about selling his Firebird and buying a Camero. Then out came the reviews on the new 2011 Mustang. Guess what? The reviews said that the Mustang was the better car. I know that some of you men, if you actually read this blog would disagree, but then again, I don't care. So, in August of last year, we ordered it. Yes, we actually ordered it. The dealership did not have one on the lot that matched the criteria that we wanted. Although they were quite willing to sell us a more expensive model that they did have in stock. They just weren't willing to sell us the more expensive model for the price of the model we actually wanted. So after waiting six weeks for the car, it came in. I think Jonathan was floating on a cloud when he got the phone call that it was in. I tried to tell him that I was too busy to go pick it up with him, but the truth was, I was really excited too. So for the past six months, we have been enjoying our date nights driving around in the new Mustang, as well as taking it on short trips to see how it handles on the road. I can tell you it handles nice. Ok, for the guys, if you actually got this far. It is a 2011, Mustang, GT, Manual Transmission V-8, if you want to know more then you better get in touch with Jonathan, because that is all I got.

Coming soon!

Ok, so I have totally slacked since September of last year. There have been things going on in our house, but in the last six months, we have had two computer crashes and all of our pictures and stuff are scattered around on cd's somewhere in a drawer. So, in the next day, I hope to have you updated on what has happened in our lives in the past six months. I don't promise to do any better than I have been doing, but I am going to try for the sake of family and friends. (who I might add, have facebooked me and asked why there is nothing on my blog). Guess that explains a lot when you get tagged to update your blog. So coming soon you will have:

The October Wedding
Thanksgiving
Christmas
Garage Project (yes another house project)
Adoption Journey
Jonathan's Birthday

I look forward to sharing and hope that you are willing to stay with me.

Dad's visit in September

My dad came to visit us with his new fiance earlier this month. It was a good time and we had fun taking them around to see things in Houston. My dad's fiance had grown up on the SE side of Houston, so she was aware of somethings, but I am sure it had changed quite a bit too. We went to the Downtown Aquarium for fun on the train, ferris wheel, and at the exhibits and then we ate dinner there too. The only downside was the fact that due to another tropical storm in Houston this time, there flight was delayed and then it was scheduled for an earlier flight that we couldn't make it to. So, instead of getting into Phoenix around 4pm or so, they got in around 9pm. A little later than was planned. I think they would both do it again though. :)

Gulfshores and New Orleans

I have to say this trip was not our best. We decided on the spur of the moment to head to Gulfport, MS. The trip was fine, except that we couldn't do some of the things we wanted to do, because it rained all the time. There had been a tropical storm that came ashore a couple of days before we got there, but what we didn't know and the nice weather forecasters didn't tell us, was that the storm was coming back around to make a second hit. So, with that, we didn't do a lot. We did however make it to Cafe DuMonde for beignets and coffee, in New Orleans.

The view from our hotel room. Not bad if I do say so. Jonathan booked the room and it was great.

At Cafe Du Monde, enjoying the beignets. I could eat these everyday, they are so good. If you haven't had one, I highly recommend going to New Orleans, just for these.