I know that stuff has happened between the July posting and this one, but here is the latest and greatest information. This is as of October 11, 2011.
Hello everyone, this is a long blog so if you don't have time to read it, do it later. There is a lot of information in it.
Ok, we have been in court for the last two days and we really appreciate your prayers. Court yesterday consisted of CPS changing their goal for what to do with Jody. Their goal for the past 16 months has been for an unrelated adoption (or secondarily reunification with dad). Then yesterday in court they announced that they were going for only for reunification with dad. This sent everyone for a tailspin, including the judge, who was mad to say the least. He then promptly postponed the case until today.
So, when the judge left court yesterday, we (being the grandparents, the aunt who has had custody of Jody for 16 months, Jonathan and myself) all stayed back and talked to the ad-litem attorneys (court-appointed to represent the child). The ad-litems then informed us that at this point CPS could come back today and drop the case and we would have no standing. Jody would go back to his father. This was not an option for any of us. So the ad-litems then went into action and told the aunt that she needed to get her own attorney and file a petition for intervention. So, I spent from the end of court (5:30) to about 9pm coordinating the meeting that we were going to have this morning with the new attorney for the Aunt.
This morning, the aunt and I went downtown and met with the new attorney. We loved her. She told us what to expect today and she gave us hope that we could win this battle. The aunt and grandparents are paying for the new attorney, which gives an indication of how motivated they are for Jody to go to a good home. Up to this point, all court costs have been covered by the state. So, the new attorney filed the petition for intervention as well as a petition for continuance. When we got to court at 1:30 today, she handed the paperwork to the other attorneys involved and you could see the surprise on their faces. When it was our turn before the judge, all of the attorneys spoke and the judge made some "recommendations" that we all think are great, because it will hopefully hold the birth father a little more accountable. Then the judge granted both of the petitions that our lawyer put before him. He also granted a new mediation, which is what our attorney recommended, and a new trial date.
So, here is what comes next. We do NOT go to trial next week. The dad has to fill out another financial form, because the judge stated that his belief is that the dad was not indigent and that dad would have to make payments back to his lawyer (!). This thrilled us, because he is no longer indigent and would be responsible for covering his own costs. Then the judge spoke to the lawyers and recommended to the father's attorney that he should try and make his client take a deal at mediation because if he doesn't he could be going before a "firing squad" at trial. So this is also good news for us. So before the end of the year, we will be heading to mediation again. This time with an attorney speaking for us. Our attorney will also be investigating the father and all allegations so that she can be best prepared for mediation and for potential trial. The outcome that we would like at mediation would be for both mom and dad to terminate their own rights. This would be the best case scenario and unlikely given all that has occurred so far. The other compromise they could make would be them granting the aunt, primary managing conservatorship (PMC). Once that is granted the aunt has custody of the child, but she can then designate if she wants someone else to be guardian. She can have him placed with us and CPS would be off the case, which is the plan if PMC occurs. The parents would still have parental rights and would have to pay child support and do visitations. The next step would be that we would keep Jody in our home full time. If, as expected, the parents don't fulfill their responsibilities with child support and/or visitations during the next year from the time of pmc, then we could file for termination and be able to adopt. So, it could go on for another year without final adoption, but we could get Jody in our home by the new year.
Keep praying for us
Showing posts with label Adoption. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Adoption. Show all posts
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Adoption Update #3
Ok, so June has come and gone and we did not have either mediation or a hearing like we were supposed to. We were informed that the mediation would be held on July 11th, so we wait again. We have been told that we are to be at the mediation hearing so Jonathan will go as has been the norm for us. He goes, while I watch the baby. We don't have high hopes for this mediation. Let me explain why I don't have high hopes for mediation. Mediation is supposed to show the birth parents what all they have going against them, so that they will then terminate their own rights without having to wait on the judge to terminate their rights. The birth parents actually can ask for visitation, or for cards, pictures, and other things from the time the parents terminate their rights and final adoption by the adoptive parents. Then the adoptive parents can terminate all contact with the birth parents.
I don't have high hopes for this due to the fact that the birth parents in our case would rather blame the judge for terminating their rights then terminating them on their own, because then they would have to admit that they are bad parents (at this time). Since, this has been the case in the past with at least the birth mom, we have a little bit of reason to assume this will be the same this time around.
We know that God is still in control of this situation and believe it or not, we have more people on our side than even I can believe. I will tell you more about that at another time. We are still hoping and praying that everything that is currently going on with the birth parents will come to light with both the judge, the lawyers, and the child advocates. We have had some good news, but as any of you know with CPS that can change very quickly and without warning. Keep us in your prayers as we continue this journey.
I don't have high hopes for this due to the fact that the birth parents in our case would rather blame the judge for terminating their rights then terminating them on their own, because then they would have to admit that they are bad parents (at this time). Since, this has been the case in the past with at least the birth mom, we have a little bit of reason to assume this will be the same this time around.
We know that God is still in control of this situation and believe it or not, we have more people on our side than even I can believe. I will tell you more about that at another time. We are still hoping and praying that everything that is currently going on with the birth parents will come to light with both the judge, the lawyers, and the child advocates. We have had some good news, but as any of you know with CPS that can change very quickly and without warning. Keep us in your prayers as we continue this journey.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Adoption #2
Ok, so as many of you know, we went to court yesterday. This proceeding was to see if the birth parents had done what they were supposed to do, and then to see what the judges ruling was going to be. Well, lets just say, it didn't go as we had planned. We figured on there being an extension for another month, but we didn't figure on the next part of the case.
The next part of the case...
The judge ordered Child Advocates onto the case, so we now have one Child Advocate and two volunteers to work with in regards to this case and we have been informed that at some point they will be coming to our house to talk to us and inspect our home. We aren't worried about that at all. The Child Advocates will also be talking to the Grandparents, the Aunts/Uncles, the babies sister, birth parents, and everyone else in the family who knows what is going on in the family dynamics. Then on or before June 16th we will all head to mediation with a retired Judge. This judge will talk to all of us and see if we can come to a understanding as to what is best for the baby. My assumption is that the Judge and the Child Advocates will return all of the information to the presiding Judge and from there he will make his ruling on June 22nd.
If he does not make a ruling on June 22nd, we head to a Jury Trial. What that entails, I have no idea and I hope and pray that we don't get that far, for my own sanity. The judge has extended the one year deadline by one week, so instead of the end of this case being July 27, it is now August 1st. This was requested by CPS, although we don't really know why.
So, there is still a lot up in the air right now and we ask that you continue to pray for us as we go through this process. We truly believe that God is in control and we have the reassurance that the Grandparents want us to have this child as they have said as much to the judge yesterday. God has everything in his hands and the Grandparents and us truly believe that.
The next part of the case...
The judge ordered Child Advocates onto the case, so we now have one Child Advocate and two volunteers to work with in regards to this case and we have been informed that at some point they will be coming to our house to talk to us and inspect our home. We aren't worried about that at all. The Child Advocates will also be talking to the Grandparents, the Aunts/Uncles, the babies sister, birth parents, and everyone else in the family who knows what is going on in the family dynamics. Then on or before June 16th we will all head to mediation with a retired Judge. This judge will talk to all of us and see if we can come to a understanding as to what is best for the baby. My assumption is that the Judge and the Child Advocates will return all of the information to the presiding Judge and from there he will make his ruling on June 22nd.
If he does not make a ruling on June 22nd, we head to a Jury Trial. What that entails, I have no idea and I hope and pray that we don't get that far, for my own sanity. The judge has extended the one year deadline by one week, so instead of the end of this case being July 27, it is now August 1st. This was requested by CPS, although we don't really know why.
So, there is still a lot up in the air right now and we ask that you continue to pray for us as we go through this process. We truly believe that God is in control and we have the reassurance that the Grandparents want us to have this child as they have said as much to the judge yesterday. God has everything in his hands and the Grandparents and us truly believe that.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Adoption
Well, this post will be long and unfortunately not full of pictures as we are not allowed to post anything yet. The end of February we got a call from the music minister at our church asking us if we would be interested in adopting a nine month old baby boy. I told him that we would need more information but were willing to at least listen to what might be going on with this situation. So with that, he said that he would let the person know that we were at least interested.
Let me go back. The grandparents of this baby boy had decided after having him from the time that he was 2 1/2 half months old that they were not going to be able to raise this baby and that he needed a family that could keep up with him. They wanted to be grandparents, not parents. So, when CPS told them that they were going to broadcast the baby, the grandparents asked if they could find a suitable home for him that was a good Christian home. CPS (to my astonishment) said that they could, but that the family would have to be certified by the state first. So the grandparents, started calling churches to ask if they knew of anyone that was willing to adopt a baby boy. Well, when they got to our church, the notice went out confidentially and before we knew it, three people from our church had recommended us to this family.
So, we got the call from the music minister and then waited, and waited, and waited. Until finally we decided that the grandparents must have found another family for their grandson. So we decided that we would just continue to wait on our agency to find us a family. Well, the middle of March comes and we get another call from our church saying that the grandparents would like to talk to us. So, we prayed about what to do. Because if you know us, you know that for us, we really wanted siblings, so that we could be done with the adoption process in one fell swoop. I knew that I would be ok with one child, but I knew that my husband who was raised in a house as an only child really wanted two. So, as we continued to pray about this situation, he told me one night that he would be okay with having one kid at a time, or possible just one kid total. Depending on what the Lord decided. This completely blew me apart.
So we met with the grandparents on a Saturday in March. We immediately fell in love with them and the fact that they love this little guy as if he were their own. We were also a little surprised to find out that parental rights had not been terminated, but we knew that God had started this so He would see it through. So, again after praying about this baby for a week, we decided to meet him. Well, lets just say, we hit it off with him too. He is a very precious little boy and so much fun to be around. So with that, CPS said that we should start visitation with the baby as well.
You would think that all would be done now and we would have the baby in our home, but God has other plans. We went to court on April 13th with everyone hoping that parental rights would be terminated at this hearing, since we are nine months into this case now. Unfortunately, that is not what happened. Due to elections, we had a new judge who was not familiar with the case and gave a thirty day extension on the case. So we go back to court on May 18th, with the hopes that parental rights will be terminated at this time. We completely trust in God that He has brought all of us together for a reason and that if this is what His will is for us that this baby, who will be one by the time the court hearing takes place be placed in our home shortly after this court hearing.
We ask that you continue to pray for us as we go through this journey for this little guy. We have also recently found out that the birth parents are now fighting to get custody back. After showing no interest in him for the past nine months, so we pray that the judge will see through this little display.
Let me go back. The grandparents of this baby boy had decided after having him from the time that he was 2 1/2 half months old that they were not going to be able to raise this baby and that he needed a family that could keep up with him. They wanted to be grandparents, not parents. So, when CPS told them that they were going to broadcast the baby, the grandparents asked if they could find a suitable home for him that was a good Christian home. CPS (to my astonishment) said that they could, but that the family would have to be certified by the state first. So the grandparents, started calling churches to ask if they knew of anyone that was willing to adopt a baby boy. Well, when they got to our church, the notice went out confidentially and before we knew it, three people from our church had recommended us to this family.
So, we got the call from the music minister and then waited, and waited, and waited. Until finally we decided that the grandparents must have found another family for their grandson. So we decided that we would just continue to wait on our agency to find us a family. Well, the middle of March comes and we get another call from our church saying that the grandparents would like to talk to us. So, we prayed about what to do. Because if you know us, you know that for us, we really wanted siblings, so that we could be done with the adoption process in one fell swoop. I knew that I would be ok with one child, but I knew that my husband who was raised in a house as an only child really wanted two. So, as we continued to pray about this situation, he told me one night that he would be okay with having one kid at a time, or possible just one kid total. Depending on what the Lord decided. This completely blew me apart.
So we met with the grandparents on a Saturday in March. We immediately fell in love with them and the fact that they love this little guy as if he were their own. We were also a little surprised to find out that parental rights had not been terminated, but we knew that God had started this so He would see it through. So, again after praying about this baby for a week, we decided to meet him. Well, lets just say, we hit it off with him too. He is a very precious little boy and so much fun to be around. So with that, CPS said that we should start visitation with the baby as well.
You would think that all would be done now and we would have the baby in our home, but God has other plans. We went to court on April 13th with everyone hoping that parental rights would be terminated at this hearing, since we are nine months into this case now. Unfortunately, that is not what happened. Due to elections, we had a new judge who was not familiar with the case and gave a thirty day extension on the case. So we go back to court on May 18th, with the hopes that parental rights will be terminated at this time. We completely trust in God that He has brought all of us together for a reason and that if this is what His will is for us that this baby, who will be one by the time the court hearing takes place be placed in our home shortly after this court hearing.
We ask that you continue to pray for us as we go through this journey for this little guy. We have also recently found out that the birth parents are now fighting to get custody back. After showing no interest in him for the past nine months, so we pray that the judge will see through this little display.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Six months since my last...
Ok, so it has been six months since my last post. I know, I am totally slacking. Things have happened in the past six months that honestly, I would like to remember and forget all at the same time. Lets start with April shall we?
April - We had a great time, Jonathan and I went to San Antonio for his birthday. We spent an entire day at Sea World. What a fantastic place for both kids and adults. Since Jonathan loves marine life, we went there. Actually I surprised him and took him there. That was a fantastic time and I will post pictures soon. Well, let's change that to later today. This gives me a deadline.
April - Jonathan also finished replacing the columns on the front of the house. We found out that we had termites in the columns, so we demolished all four of them and rebuilt two of them. Not an easy task, but Jonathan did it, with I have to say only a little bit of help from me. Again, pictures will come soon.
Middle of April - We found out that we were chosen to foster two little ones. We were so excited because they were 4 months and 14 months. So they were great ages, although, lots of hard work. We spent as much time with them as we could and got them healthy again, although some thanks goes to the first foster parents for getting them healthy. We just continued what they had already started. This was a fun time to learn about how Jonathan and I interacted as parents to each other and to strengthen and learn from each other during this time. I will say that our marriage was truly tested during this time.
May - Was my birthday, and as much as Jonathan wanted to surprise me with something like I surprised him with, we had two children now, so we couldn't do that. He did however, find a babysitter for the night and we were able to go out to a nice quiet dinner without the rush of getting babies fed and down for the night. It was a very sweet night.
Beginning of June - My nephew Cody came out to visit us for two weeks. What fun that was. Unfortunately because we had the kids, we didn't get to do as many cool things as we had hoped to do, but he was willing to go along with whatever. We did make it to the beach one day, I think this will become tradition when he comes out. We were able to also get to a couple museums, but I think the best thing that Cody liked was the fact that he got to build or at least start to build a model car with Jonathan. Cody took it home with him to finish because they were not able to get it all done, due to kids, trips, and all that stuff.
End of Jun - We continued on, but what we didn't know was that things were working behind the scenes to move the children back to their first foster placement. We did not find out that the kids were going to be moved until the night before they were moved. This was hard to take. We thought we had our family through the CPS System, only to find out that the case worker didn't like us. It was difficult, we felt that we had just lost two of our own kids. We were becoming attached to these kids. I know as foster parents you are not to become as they say "attached" because at any time they could leave, but we were being told over and over that it was a pretty clear case. In the end, the kids went back to their first foster parents, we grieved for them. Then we praised God that they did go back to people that at least they knew. We pray continually for their safety, as the case is ongoing at least through December of this year.
July - In order to get some rest and to get out of a now way to quiet house. We left. We went to Austin for a couple of days. We spend fourth of July up there and just relaxed, hiked, and got a new perspective on us. In this time, we prayed and decided that we would wait to decided to continue the adoption process. This wait time will give us the prayer time to listen to what God is telling us with regards to our family. We will be waiting and listening through December. This will also allow us to decompress and travel without the worry of missing a phone call for kids because we are out of town.
August - Was spent pretty much just doing normal day to day stuff. We didn't go anywhere, we really didn't do anything, but that was okay. We focused on us, on our ministries at the church, our small group Bible studies. It was good.
September - I am finally up to this month. Whew! This month we had my dad and his fiance come visit us. It was a good time. We were able to go to the Aquarium downtown and see the exhibits, which again, was one of Jonathan's favorites. We were even able to get my dad's fiance on the ferris wheel which she claimed to be afraid of. She told us later, that it was the old type ferris wheels that she didn't like, not these knew ones. So it wasn't so bad. We had a good time, although the time went by very quickly. We will head back for their wedding next month and then they will be out here in November. Then it is a quiet December month, no traveling, well, except to do a quick visit to Jonathan's parents place early in the month. Then it will be a quiet December and Christmas.
Ok, I am done, there are the updates. Now I need to go find some pictures so that you can see that we actually were busy through at least some of these months. Thanks friends for reading this far, provided you actually read it and didn't just skip to the bottom.
April - We had a great time, Jonathan and I went to San Antonio for his birthday. We spent an entire day at Sea World. What a fantastic place for both kids and adults. Since Jonathan loves marine life, we went there. Actually I surprised him and took him there. That was a fantastic time and I will post pictures soon. Well, let's change that to later today. This gives me a deadline.
April - Jonathan also finished replacing the columns on the front of the house. We found out that we had termites in the columns, so we demolished all four of them and rebuilt two of them. Not an easy task, but Jonathan did it, with I have to say only a little bit of help from me. Again, pictures will come soon.
Middle of April - We found out that we were chosen to foster two little ones. We were so excited because they were 4 months and 14 months. So they were great ages, although, lots of hard work. We spent as much time with them as we could and got them healthy again, although some thanks goes to the first foster parents for getting them healthy. We just continued what they had already started. This was a fun time to learn about how Jonathan and I interacted as parents to each other and to strengthen and learn from each other during this time. I will say that our marriage was truly tested during this time.
May - Was my birthday, and as much as Jonathan wanted to surprise me with something like I surprised him with, we had two children now, so we couldn't do that. He did however, find a babysitter for the night and we were able to go out to a nice quiet dinner without the rush of getting babies fed and down for the night. It was a very sweet night.
Beginning of June - My nephew Cody came out to visit us for two weeks. What fun that was. Unfortunately because we had the kids, we didn't get to do as many cool things as we had hoped to do, but he was willing to go along with whatever. We did make it to the beach one day, I think this will become tradition when he comes out. We were able to also get to a couple museums, but I think the best thing that Cody liked was the fact that he got to build or at least start to build a model car with Jonathan. Cody took it home with him to finish because they were not able to get it all done, due to kids, trips, and all that stuff.
End of Jun - We continued on, but what we didn't know was that things were working behind the scenes to move the children back to their first foster placement. We did not find out that the kids were going to be moved until the night before they were moved. This was hard to take. We thought we had our family through the CPS System, only to find out that the case worker didn't like us. It was difficult, we felt that we had just lost two of our own kids. We were becoming attached to these kids. I know as foster parents you are not to become as they say "attached" because at any time they could leave, but we were being told over and over that it was a pretty clear case. In the end, the kids went back to their first foster parents, we grieved for them. Then we praised God that they did go back to people that at least they knew. We pray continually for their safety, as the case is ongoing at least through December of this year.
July - In order to get some rest and to get out of a now way to quiet house. We left. We went to Austin for a couple of days. We spend fourth of July up there and just relaxed, hiked, and got a new perspective on us. In this time, we prayed and decided that we would wait to decided to continue the adoption process. This wait time will give us the prayer time to listen to what God is telling us with regards to our family. We will be waiting and listening through December. This will also allow us to decompress and travel without the worry of missing a phone call for kids because we are out of town.
August - Was spent pretty much just doing normal day to day stuff. We didn't go anywhere, we really didn't do anything, but that was okay. We focused on us, on our ministries at the church, our small group Bible studies. It was good.
September - I am finally up to this month. Whew! This month we had my dad and his fiance come visit us. It was a good time. We were able to go to the Aquarium downtown and see the exhibits, which again, was one of Jonathan's favorites. We were even able to get my dad's fiance on the ferris wheel which she claimed to be afraid of. She told us later, that it was the old type ferris wheels that she didn't like, not these knew ones. So it wasn't so bad. We had a good time, although the time went by very quickly. We will head back for their wedding next month and then they will be out here in November. Then it is a quiet December month, no traveling, well, except to do a quick visit to Jonathan's parents place early in the month. Then it will be a quiet December and Christmas.
Ok, I am done, there are the updates. Now I need to go find some pictures so that you can see that we actually were busy through at least some of these months. Thanks friends for reading this far, provided you actually read it and didn't just skip to the bottom.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Adoption update and News
Hi all,
I know it has been a long time since I have posted and this is going to be a long blog, but hang in there. Before Christmas we were sent a set of siblings to look at and decide if we wanted to put our name out there for the possibility of adopting. We decided that they fell close enough to the range of ages that we were looking for that we said yes. Then Christmas happened and the New Year came and we were notified that we had been chosen for the final four. The same day this happened we were also given another set of siblings to look at. We put our name in for the new set as well, even though we had our name in for the previous set too.
Well, the short story goes, that we were chosen for the first set as the parents to adopt them. The problem with this was that we didn't feel like they were our children. We felt that the second set was ours. So, after praying diligently about it and feeling total peace, we turned down the first set. I then spoke to our Arrow coordinator - Gregory - and he said that he also agreed that the first set were supposed to go to the other family - also Christians. So we waited to hear if we were going to be in the final four for the set that we knew in our hearts were ours. We found out on Monday of last week that we were indeed chosen for the final four. Then today we found out that we were chosen. NOW for the problem - We have to go to court on the 10th of this month to explain to the judge why both children should be placed with us. We have to do this, because currently both children are placed in two different homes and the home that has the younger child is wanting to fight for full custody of him. I ask that you all pray for the Judge in charge of our case on the 10th that he will see the good in placing siblings together into a loving home. I would love to say that the odds are in our favor, but at this point in time we don't. It is going to be a God thing, so please pray, because as I said before, we both feel that God has given us these kids and our hearts are already with these children. Pray!! That is all I can say - Pray!!
I know it has been a long time since I have posted and this is going to be a long blog, but hang in there. Before Christmas we were sent a set of siblings to look at and decide if we wanted to put our name out there for the possibility of adopting. We decided that they fell close enough to the range of ages that we were looking for that we said yes. Then Christmas happened and the New Year came and we were notified that we had been chosen for the final four. The same day this happened we were also given another set of siblings to look at. We put our name in for the new set as well, even though we had our name in for the previous set too.
Well, the short story goes, that we were chosen for the first set as the parents to adopt them. The problem with this was that we didn't feel like they were our children. We felt that the second set was ours. So, after praying diligently about it and feeling total peace, we turned down the first set. I then spoke to our Arrow coordinator - Gregory - and he said that he also agreed that the first set were supposed to go to the other family - also Christians. So we waited to hear if we were going to be in the final four for the set that we knew in our hearts were ours. We found out on Monday of last week that we were indeed chosen for the final four. Then today we found out that we were chosen. NOW for the problem - We have to go to court on the 10th of this month to explain to the judge why both children should be placed with us. We have to do this, because currently both children are placed in two different homes and the home that has the younger child is wanting to fight for full custody of him. I ask that you all pray for the Judge in charge of our case on the 10th that he will see the good in placing siblings together into a loving home. I would love to say that the odds are in our favor, but at this point in time we don't. It is going to be a God thing, so please pray, because as I said before, we both feel that God has given us these kids and our hearts are already with these children. Pray!! That is all I can say - Pray!!
Monday, October 12, 2009
The boys go to grandmas
Well, it was a week ago today that the two boys left our home. Kaleb and Dylan were a handful but they made our house loud and fun too. We realized what it meant to be parents for the first time.
Although this was a fun experience, it also sent us spinning. Our thoughts had always been that we would foster to adopt, not just foster. When we took the boys we were told that grandparents didn't want them and that the parents could not handle them and would more than likely have the rights terminated. So to find out that there were grandparents who wanted them, sent us for a little bit of a loop. It is all for the best we know and we know that God's hand is in it all, but it has like I said made us re-look at what we are to do.
The day after the boys left our home, we got a call from our agency saying that they had a one year old boy. I had to tell them no, due to the fact that we are scared. There I said it, we are scared that if we get another child and really get attached that they will be taken away from us. I know you are thinking, well that is what foster to adopt is. Yes, it is, but until you have been through it, quit saying it. It isn't that easy. We asked for a break from our agency and told them that we would call them when we were ready to start the process again. We pray that God will show us guidance as we re-evaluate our profile for adoption.
Thank you all for the support that was shown to us through the time that we had the boys and after the boys were gone. The house is quiet now and for the first time in a month, I actually had time to clean the house, like really clean it, dust, vacuum. Not just pick it up and make it look nice. You have been there, don't lie.
Although this was a fun experience, it also sent us spinning. Our thoughts had always been that we would foster to adopt, not just foster. When we took the boys we were told that grandparents didn't want them and that the parents could not handle them and would more than likely have the rights terminated. So to find out that there were grandparents who wanted them, sent us for a little bit of a loop. It is all for the best we know and we know that God's hand is in it all, but it has like I said made us re-look at what we are to do.
The day after the boys left our home, we got a call from our agency saying that they had a one year old boy. I had to tell them no, due to the fact that we are scared. There I said it, we are scared that if we get another child and really get attached that they will be taken away from us. I know you are thinking, well that is what foster to adopt is. Yes, it is, but until you have been through it, quit saying it. It isn't that easy. We asked for a break from our agency and told them that we would call them when we were ready to start the process again. We pray that God will show us guidance as we re-evaluate our profile for adoption.
Thank you all for the support that was shown to us through the time that we had the boys and after the boys were gone. The house is quiet now and for the first time in a month, I actually had time to clean the house, like really clean it, dust, vacuum. Not just pick it up and make it look nice. You have been there, don't lie.
Friday, September 25, 2009
Foster update
Well, we got some news today that I thought I would write about. Since I had heard nothing from the boys CPS caseworker, I decided to email her and find out what was going on with the court cases, if they had been set yet and when they were and other information regarding the boys. She emailed back very quickly and told me that there was a court date on Monday, four days ago, and that both of the boys parents had shown up and that they had also brought a relative who was willing to take the boys.
You would think this would disappoint me, but in reality, if God leads the boys to be with a relative then that is where they are supposed to be. Why were we not at the court hearing or even notified of it, I don't know. It doesn't make any sense. In actuality, I was hoping to get to go to court and at least meet the parents and tell them how well the boys are doing. My only thought was and is that it wasn't in God's plan for us to meet.
So after emailing the caseworker back and forth this afternoon, I found out that she has to do a homestudy on the relative and then it has to go through the entire procedure of approvals. If it gets approved, the boys could be moved and placed in that home within 30days. We ask that you pray for God's will to be done in these boys lives. If they are to be placed with this relative, let it be quickly so that they don't have any more emotional trauma than they already do and can finally be in a place that hopefully they will be able to stay in. At least that is my dream for them. We also ask that you pray for our home in the next couple of weeks that we will be able to transition them well if again, it turns out they will be leaving. There are a lot of IF'S right now, so keep up the praying.
You would think this would disappoint me, but in reality, if God leads the boys to be with a relative then that is where they are supposed to be. Why were we not at the court hearing or even notified of it, I don't know. It doesn't make any sense. In actuality, I was hoping to get to go to court and at least meet the parents and tell them how well the boys are doing. My only thought was and is that it wasn't in God's plan for us to meet.
So after emailing the caseworker back and forth this afternoon, I found out that she has to do a homestudy on the relative and then it has to go through the entire procedure of approvals. If it gets approved, the boys could be moved and placed in that home within 30days. We ask that you pray for God's will to be done in these boys lives. If they are to be placed with this relative, let it be quickly so that they don't have any more emotional trauma than they already do and can finally be in a place that hopefully they will be able to stay in. At least that is my dream for them. We also ask that you pray for our home in the next couple of weeks that we will be able to transition them well if again, it turns out they will be leaving. There are a lot of IF'S right now, so keep up the praying.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Foster to adopt
Ok, so I haven't written in awhile, but things have been kind of hectic and if you have read my facebook page or talked to me on the phone you would understand why. We were asked this past Monday to take an emergency placement for two little boys. After praying about it quickly, we decided that yes we would take the placement.
The boys are ages 2 and 3 and are really cute little boys. With that said, God has really given us a challenge with these boys as they have very little discipline. Now that you know that, let me focus on the positives of this past week. We have gone from having to hold them in time-out to having them stand on their own in time-out without screaming. That doesn't mean there is not sometimes a scream and a fight before they get there, but they usually do it fairly soon lately. We have also been teaching them to ask nice and to say please and thank you. Their philosophy is that everything is theirs so we are also working on the fact that things are not theirs, they are the families and they need to share.
That is just to name a few. We have gotten them into a routine which seems to have stabalized them somewhat, although the oldest one still tends to want to exit his room whenever he wants instead of waiting for mommy and daddy. We hope that he will get it soon, because getting up at the crack of dawn every morning is getting tiring. (I know for you moms with babies and other kids, you are laughing right now, but hey, I am just being real).
Unfortunately, we can not post any pictures on this blog until they are officially adopted either by us or by someone else. We don't know the status of their court case yet. Please be in prayer for us as it has been a daily struggle to find God's will in this and to be patient and teachable to the kids.
The boys are ages 2 and 3 and are really cute little boys. With that said, God has really given us a challenge with these boys as they have very little discipline. Now that you know that, let me focus on the positives of this past week. We have gone from having to hold them in time-out to having them stand on their own in time-out without screaming. That doesn't mean there is not sometimes a scream and a fight before they get there, but they usually do it fairly soon lately. We have also been teaching them to ask nice and to say please and thank you. Their philosophy is that everything is theirs so we are also working on the fact that things are not theirs, they are the families and they need to share.
That is just to name a few. We have gotten them into a routine which seems to have stabalized them somewhat, although the oldest one still tends to want to exit his room whenever he wants instead of waiting for mommy and daddy. We hope that he will get it soon, because getting up at the crack of dawn every morning is getting tiring. (I know for you moms with babies and other kids, you are laughing right now, but hey, I am just being real).
Unfortunately, we can not post any pictures on this blog until they are officially adopted either by us or by someone else. We don't know the status of their court case yet. Please be in prayer for us as it has been a daily struggle to find God's will in this and to be patient and teachable to the kids.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Home Study
We had our home study. It was quickly scheduled, so I didn't have time to post before he got here. I got a call late Wednesday night from a Arrow guy saying that he would like to schedule our home study for the next day. Well, that wasn't possible, due to the fact that my dear husband worked. So we decided on Friday afternoon. So after working all day on Thursday, I raced home, ran errands, cleaned house and did other things that needed to get done. On Friday afternoon, he showed up and said, lets talk. So for three hours we talked. We talked to him separately and then together. Then once all the questions were over, he asked us what our ideal was? Well, we said three children, under the age of four, any race, and that one of them needed to be a baby, because I wanted the baby experience. (I know crazy). The Arrow man got so excited, first of all that we were willing to take any race and secondly siblings. His comment was, once you are verified, I will have all sorts of groups for you to look at. So, of course, we had to calm him down a little bit and let him know that sending emails is off limits until the 27th of this month. We have to get my dear husband through his promotion test first. He agreed and since there will probably only be about two or three days between the two that wasn't a problem. There is one thing that the Arrow man said that I was totally excited to hear and have heard from other adoptive parents and that is: God will show you your children if you are listening to Him. I thought that is so cool, because we know of at least one other adoptive family that has said the same thing to us and this guy knows them. I can't tell you how excited, scared, and every other emotion that I am, but I know that if I and my dear husband are listening to God he will show us the children for our forever family. Thank you all for praying for us, and keep it up as this is only the beginning.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Adoption Update
Well, I thought I would give you an update. We have recently found out that all of our paperwork is in order and all we have to do is wait on the homestudy. When I talked to the trainer at our agency he said that it would be a few weeks until they were able to get to our homestudy due to the fact that they had a lot of people out on vacation. I laughed and said that we wouldn't be ready for a few weeks anyway because we are out of town. Needless to say he was relieved. We hope that come August we will be able to get our homestudy done and be verified like our close friends soon. We are so excited to be this close to our forever family, but since we are not going the straight adoption route, this is actually going to be just the start of a whole new adventure. What an exciting time for J and I to be truly leaning on the Lord for our strength.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
We Passed!!!
We passed our fire inspection!!! We are finished with one more step. The guy was great, and very friendly. We are well on our way to finishing all of the paperwork and steps in order to start the home study process. I can't tell you how excited this is for both of us. Keep praying that everything else goes smoothly.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Fire Marshall
Well the fire Marshall is coming tomorrow afternoon. I think we are ready to go, but you never know what will happen. We did make a connection with the inspector coming out tomorrow as I dropped the fact that my husband is a firefighter. This brought about much discussion on where he was at and that the inspector had been retired for almost 20years. This made me feel a little more comfortable. J and I will both be home tomorrow for the inspection and I will let you know what happens. Pray for us as this is one more hurdle to get us one step closer to being licensed.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Where have we been?
Hello again!! I know it has been a while. Almost three months now, but we are still here. Most of our fellow friends are aware that we have been going through the motions of adopting. What does this entail, well,let me give you a list - Adoption (parenting) classes, ten of them. Making modifications to our home - including interconnecting smoke detectors, attic door locks and other child protective measures. Then having our TB test done, CPR certification completed, Fingerprints sent off to the FBI, background checks completed as well as a mountain of paperwork.
Now - you say, what will this get you and why are you doing this? We are doing this because after much prayer, we feel that God has led us in this direction. We are so excited about becoming parents. God has given both Jonathan and I a peace about this. Does that peace always remain - YES - but that doesn't mean that we don't get scared and confused sometimes. We have asked the adoption agency for a sibling group of up to three kids no older than 4 years old. This means that we could conceivably have three children placed in our home at once all under the age of four. Heaven help us!! We do have peace about it and know that this would be our forever family that God has designed for us. About now you are asking, well what about race, ethnicity? We have talked about that too and we are open to God's guidance on that. When we are asked if we are interested in a particular group of kids, we will pray and ask God's leadership and peace.
I have to say that even though I am not pregnant, all of my senses are heightened. This process has been quick for the most part, even though sometimes it feels like it is taking forever. We are finished with all but two of our classes, are getting ready for the fire marshall to come inspect our home and then it is finalizing paperwork and the home study. Since we just started this in April, I think we are cruising right along. I will keep you posted as we near the next step, which is the fire marshall. Keep us in your prayers as we are excited, scared, apprehensive, and ever faithful about this journey that God is taking us on.
Now - you say, what will this get you and why are you doing this? We are doing this because after much prayer, we feel that God has led us in this direction. We are so excited about becoming parents. God has given both Jonathan and I a peace about this. Does that peace always remain - YES - but that doesn't mean that we don't get scared and confused sometimes. We have asked the adoption agency for a sibling group of up to three kids no older than 4 years old. This means that we could conceivably have three children placed in our home at once all under the age of four. Heaven help us!! We do have peace about it and know that this would be our forever family that God has designed for us. About now you are asking, well what about race, ethnicity? We have talked about that too and we are open to God's guidance on that. When we are asked if we are interested in a particular group of kids, we will pray and ask God's leadership and peace.
I have to say that even though I am not pregnant, all of my senses are heightened. This process has been quick for the most part, even though sometimes it feels like it is taking forever. We are finished with all but two of our classes, are getting ready for the fire marshall to come inspect our home and then it is finalizing paperwork and the home study. Since we just started this in April, I think we are cruising right along. I will keep you posted as we near the next step, which is the fire marshall. Keep us in your prayers as we are excited, scared, apprehensive, and ever faithful about this journey that God is taking us on.
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